David G ordered a pair of our National Team Bibs. A week after he got them, he was in a race. He crashed. He got back up. This is what Sufferlandrians do. Here is the email he sent us letting us know that his bibs had been destroyed:
“The finish line was in sight. Just ahead, through the red mist of pain, I could make out the flecks of foam on Grunter’s screaming, frenzied face. I was reeling in that prideful upstart Bulgarian, you know, the one we’ve hated ever since that episode with the podium girls and the beet stew. I knew that back home in our village, they were preparing to slaughter the finest young lambs, and were rolling out the casks of vodka-laced Accelerade that the village fathers had set aside years ago in anticipation of just such an occasion. I saw all of this as my wheel drew up alongside his, and I rose from the saddle for the last, all-out sprint. If the Suffer Scale went up to eleven, even to (let me think here) about eleven-point-three, I would go there in this moment for my nation. And then… a small Sufferlandrian child, hardly old enough to ride her carbon-frame tricycle, but unable to contain her joy, burst from her father’s arms and ran straight into our path, bearing a bouquet of roses. The Bulgarian swerved, our wheels made contact. A blur of sky… and suddenly I found myself supine on the asphalt, blood on my drivetrain, and a rose thorn in my thigh. The podium girls were blowing kisses to the Bulgarian. He shall taste the heel of my racing shoes for this.”
We’re sending David a pair of bibs at half price with free shipping. For anyone who destroys their kit due to a crash in the first three months of owning the kit, we’ll do the same. If you write a nice letter like he did.