Sufferfest Blog

Sufferlandria: Harshest penalties for doping – loss of citizenship

Racing bans. Lost salaries. Public humiliation. While these are the consequences in many countries for taking performance enhancing drugs, the Sufferlandrian Federation has just come out with the strongest position of any country: citizens will be stripped of their Nationality. According to Grunter Von Agony, Sufferlandrian National Team Director Sportif, “Sufferlandrians Suffer. That is what we do. Drugs take away suffering. So, you take away Suffering, we take away your passport. Simple.” The full statement: ————– The full text: Date: 17/10/12 To: All Sufferlandrians Everywhere Dear Sufferlandrians, With so many National Federations coming out with their positions (or lack of

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New Sufferfest video – There is no Try – Oct 23

Since unleashing the metronomic misery of The Long Scream early this year, the Minions have toiled away. Their objective was to release the first cycling training video based on officially licensed footage from the world’s greatest race: The Tour de France. Soon. On October 23rd, their Masterpiece will be released: There is No Try.¬†Featuring several stages, and the stars, of the historic 2012 Tour de France. A 60 minute video, it comes in three parts: A set of four accelerating intervals, from 1:00 to 4:00 in which speed increases over the course of the interval. Then an 8minute time trial,

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Clarity among Sufferfest Cycling Videos

Comparing the Sufferfest Cycling Training videos and trying to figure out which to choose? There is something calming, soothing about the clarity that a Venn diagram brings to the task.

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Protest Poster Contest

One Nation Under Suffering

Our Protest Party in London on Aug 2nd is rapidly approaching. And our indination at the IOC having shunned Sufferlandria’s nation status request grows even faster. Of course, any good protest needs good protest posters. We’re having a contest over on our Facebook page – so whip up a protest poster and post it there and stand to win a 10 pack of videos.  

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The Sufferfest 3-Video Starter Pack!

If you’re thinking of coming to Sufferlandria, but not quite sure which video is the best one to get you there, then try out our new 3-Video Starter Pack. The Minions had a tough time with this one, trying to figure out exactly which three videos would be best for the novice Sufferlandrian. To be honest, we could have picked just about any three – but, in the end, we chose Downward Spiral, Angels and The Long Scream. We selected them because they have very different personalities, are very easy to get caught up in, and focus on different areas

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Antartica is ours

What Sufferlandrians want, Sufferlandrians take. And that includes Continents.

Word just in – Sufferlandrians, led by Ron Blevens, has taken over Antartica. If anyone wants it back, come and get it.

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A Satisfied Sufferlandrian

Ah, nothing makes us happier than the sight of a Sufferlandrian in their bike torture chamber.

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The Sufferlandrian Flag never looked better

It's not a Bike Torture Chamber, but it is the best picture of our flag ever taken. Thanks!

  Sufferlandrian (and racer with in Tulsa, OK, USA%2y Mandi Amman finished a race the other day. And wrapped herself in the glory of the Sufferlandrian flag. Her husband (who owns¬† Ammann Photography) captured the moment. We love it.  

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Sufferlandrian Down – and up!

The "Everybody Hurts" on the back right leg of our shorts is apt.

David G ordered a pair of our National Team Bibs. A week after he got them, he was in a race. He crashed. He got back up. This is what Sufferlandrians do. Here is the email he sent us letting us know that his bibs had been destroyed: “The finish line was in sight. Just ahead, through the red mist of pain, I could make out the flecks of foam on Grunter’s screaming, frenzied face. I was reeling in that prideful upstart Bulgarian, you know, the one we’ve hated ever since that episode with the podium girls and the beet

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The ‘fest in 1:30

We made a little video to explain what the ‘fest is all about. And how much ass you’ll kick.  

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